Monday, November 14, 2005

www.Nixwords.blogspot.com

Had email today from a lovely lady from uni who has started one of these here blogamathingies, so have passed on this address and willl hence forth pass on all my incredible blogging knowledge -

Pearl of wisdom number one - Never say anything about anyone that you wouldn't say to their face, because when they find your blog and read it, that will be soooooo very bad.

Pearl of wisdom number two - Never talk about your family, see above.

Pearl of wisdom number three - Never talk about work or work colleagues in such a specific way that you may get dooced for it, see above.

Pearl of wisdom number four - Never post random photo's, that will only serve to highlight your poor photographic abilities.

Pearl of wisdom number five - Never post photo's of yourself, that will only serve to highlight your poor photogenic abilities.

Pearl of wisdom number six - Imagine the one person in the world who you wouldn't want reading your blog finding it and reading it, all the stuff you would never ever want them to know is where you draw the line, see number one.

Pearl of wisdom number seven - Never mention your boyfriend's bits, see number one.

Pearl of wisdom number eight - Rant, rant loads, this is the greatest and best outlet for ranting I have ever found, so what if people think you're hysterical, they probably thought that already.

Pearl of wisdom number nine - Stop caring about punctuation, you know the saying 'life is too short to stuff mushrooms'? Well life is also too short to give a crap about comma's/commas/commas'/com'mas/c'o'm'm'a's'.

Pearl of wisdom number ten - Wear matching underwear, one day you might wake up in intensive care, and when they tell you that they cut off your trousers and you remember the yellow bra purple knickers combination you were wearing, you're going to be so embarassed.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

but if they just cut off your trousers, how will they know your bra doesn't match your knickers?? ;o)

oh and incidentally - YELLOW BRA?!?

SpanAir said...

I am sure that someone, somewhere has a yellow bra...

IT'S NOT ME, but I'm sure that someone has...

And they'd have to cut off all your clothes wouldn't they? To put you in the funny paper gown thing.. Otherwise that is some fucked up A&E department that just cuts off people's trousers and sends them to ICU...

Anonymous said...

'apostrophe'apostrophe apostrop'he'ap'ostrophe'

commas,commas,commas,,com,mas,c,o,m,m,a,s,.


LMAO

SpanAir said...

I am really, REALLY hoping you know that the comma's/apostrophe thing was part of the joke....

...otherwise either you or I look stupid, and it's my website so I'm nominating you.