I can't adequately express the anger that I feel when I realise that people who claim to know me, who have known me for many years, clearly don't know a thing about me. That people I grew up with, who I shared everything with for almost half of my lifetime know less about what makes me tick than people I have known for 1/20 of my lifetime. I don't think I am a vindictive person and I don't hold grudges (I have an inability to let things go, but that's not the same as holding a grudge), why is it that a person would seek to demonise a friend who has always tried to support them (even when they couldn't understand them) just to make themselves a victim, and win some mysterious competition that only they know about.
I hope that this person finds a way to be happy herself, that she can wake up in the morning one day and truly not be affected by another persons happiness or success in a negative way. That she can find a contentment in her own achievements and not feel belittled by others. Maybe one day someone will treat her badly, I hope no one does, but if it ever happens, I hope she will take a moment to recognise the difference between hurt at the hands of someone else and hurt at the hands of herself, because the only person who judges her as severly as she feels judged, is herself. If the day ever comes when she needs someone, I will be there, but I will take some private time out to feel smug, Nobody's perfect!
God knows I'm not perfect, I have my whiny and self-pitying days, but surely you have to try to be grateful for what you have and be glad when the people you love succeed, even when it surpasses your own achievements.
To those friends and family I have who love and support me, even if you're not reading this; thank you, I hope I can do the same for you.
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