Letter

Dear Glenn,


I love you very much and to show you how much I love you, I am going to come to Oasis with you next week and I am not going to make fun of them at all, not once. You have worked very hard on the house with me and also, as it was your Christmas present, I will make every effort to be the best fan of Oasis that ever was. I will scream, I will cheer, I will NOT mention how much Noel and Liam look like extras from Planet of the Apes, with all the intellligence and sensitivity of grapefruit. No no no, I will be attentive and thoughtful and appreciative.

I'm afraid that I have to stop short of allowing any albums (new or old) to be played in my car. This is a rule that was made when I bought my first car, it was transferred to the new car and, like the ebbing of the tide or the rising of the sun, cannot be changed. However, you can take a picture of Oasis and perhaps look at it while much better music is on, maybe that will be ok.

We are going to have two wonderful days in Manc Land, we will not shop or go out because we have just bought a (beautiful) kitchen and that means we are so poor now we can barely afford food, but we will make the best of it, at least we will be together, and other such vomit inducing niceties.

Yes! We will enjoy Oasis! I have not crossed my fingers and hoped the tickets get lost in the post AT ALL. No no no, it will be wonderful. We will have northern food, like chips and gravy and while in my head I will wonder how Liam has managed to spear so many lovely blonde ladies while smelling like a septic tank, aloud I will comment on his interesting vocal performance and amusing choice of overly large coat. If there's one thing these Oasis fans do well, it is ill fitting utility chic. I may invest in an army themed jacket with fur trim myself in the spirit of the evening (and to ceremoniously burn when I come back down to earth).

Yes, it will be a memorable evening, and you just remember baby, it's all for you.

love always,

ME
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