Email

Him:
Forget anything?

Me:
My phone, I realised as I was driving past the Sutton turn off of the M42, by which time it was too late to go back. I'll have to ring the house this evening from the hotel to talk to you but could you email me your mobile number just in case because I don't know it off by heart.

Him:
I know your mobile number off by heart, does that mean I love you more and Sunderland are playing Newcastle on Sunday.

Me:
So? don't understand why you just told me that....

Him:
Because it's at 1.30 and if I have to pick you up on Sunday then I'll miss it. However, I will of course pick you up if so wish.

Me:
I see what you're doing, 'I'll miss it if I have to pick you up but if you insist on making me miss it then I suppose I'll have to...' what you should add on the end of that is 'and I'll be in a horrible mood for the whole entire week afterwards...'

Him:
No I won't, I will be in the best mood ever.

Me:
Lies, all lies... What would you rather do

a) Stay up in York with your mates and watch Sunderland v. Newcastle

b) Came home, bring me my car back, take me home and ravage me.

Him:
I see what your doing there Davis and I refuse to play your games.

Me:
You choose A by default ad therefore I no longer wish to go out with you

Him:
Okay then, well I'm keeping the blinds.

Me:
well I'm sure you and the blinds will be very happy at your mothers.