I embarassed myself this weekend.
I was a BAD drunk.
I'm not normally the bad drunk, I leave that to other people, I tend to just sit back and watch the car crash and normally, normally, I can keep a certain amount of control.
However, last night, apparently I didn't do that....
Indeed, I was the car crash.
Exhibit A - I bit Glenn, and not in a good way, no, no, he pissed me off so I grabbed his arm and bit him.
Quite badly.
Exhibit B - Gareth is a lovely bloke, and he has more or less the same sense of humour as me, but that means that when something is there to take the piss out of, he takes no prisoners. Now given that I, as I have already said, have the same sense of humour, this normally makes for a riotous evening...
Not last night though.
No, last night, I decided to get horribly offended, I had to be taken outside for a walk and a cigarette to try and calm down.
And I don't actually smoke.
I fear I have lessened myself in the face of lovely people, people who did not deserve to have their evening gatecrashed by some weird, mean and curiously violent drunk.
I can only apologise.
Glenn and I are under negotiations to try and work through his discovery of a piss head girlfriend who bit him (I mean, seriously, who the fuck was I?) he is laying a previous incident on the table that I have to let go of and if I never mention it again then he will let last night go (current favourite is either me finding the porn he downloaded on my company laptop, or the fact that I am obsessed with his ex-girlfriend - and not in a good way).
Liz and Gareth are probably at home wondering how they can get out of ever seeing me again (I mean, actually they're probably doing something that isn't about me at all, what with everybody's world not revolving around me and all) but at some point they will have to see me, and even if it's for a small moment, they will look at each other and acknowledge that they are both thinking 'but she bit him... and quite hard...' and I don't blame them... I would probably wonder if it was safe to be alone with me, teeth, and a bottle of Kronenberg Blanco as well.
I've been in a funny place all afternoon, the kind of place where you know that what you really need is a good cry. I have been wondering why I feel like this and I think I can pin it down to, ooh, all of the above? I am so embarrased, ashamed, mortified, my mother would disown me if she ever found out, and as I judge all my behaviour towards others as 'would my mother approve?' that is pretty damning...
I might actually have to move.
To Bavaria.
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2 comments:
Actually, having discovered while taking you outside to calm down that "you get very sensitive when you've had a drink and you can see why you shouldn't but you just can't help it", I thought it was quite amusing. So you're alright hon :o)
Yea to be fair I found it more amusing than embarrassing and as long as I didn't actually offend you then I'm OK. And I want to see more of 'drunk Hannah' and am going to experiment with cider and bottles of 20 20 next. Load you up and watch you go!
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